Insert Credits

Shine get!

A lot of people didn’t care for Mario Sunshine when it hit back in 2002.  The Retronauts crew has tried working it into a grand symmetry of Mario games by comparing it to the first three NES entries in the Mario series.  Mario 64 is the groundbreaking game that launched the 3D platforming genre in the same way that the original Mario for NES was the game that cemented the rules for the 2D platformer.  Mario Sunshine fits into the same spot as Mario 2, a game that takes the mechanics of the first game and goes off in an experimental direction with a completely different setting.  And Galaxy would be the return to form similar to Mario 3 that takes the mechanics of the first game and compacts it into multiple bite-sized chunks of fun.

I think that there’s something to that comparison, even if it is a bit arbitrary.  I also don’t care about it or feel the need to justify Mario Sunshine.  Put plainly, Mario Sunshine is a damned fun game that I think a worthy successor to Super Mario 64.

Mario Sunshine split the fandom along strict love it/hate it lines with the introduction of a water cannon that could be used in several ways:

1. Cleaning up paint that has been spread around levels by Bowser Jr., the game’s big bad.  Cleaning up paint could also reveal hidden areas and items.
2. Hovering in the air for a few seconds.
3. Blasting high into the air to get to hard-to-reach elevated areas in a level.

Most of the complaints I’ve seen leveled at Mario Sunshine complained that the water cannon mechanics made the platforming too easy by providing a larger margin of error than Mario 64, and those critics would be correct if Sunshine’s water cannon was introduced into Mario 64’s design aesthetic.  The problem with that line of criticism is that Mario Sunshine is a game designed from the ground up with the water cannon in mind, and that makes all the difference in the world.

I think the big problem is that people went into Super Mario Sunshine expecting a rehash of Mario 64 with better graphics.  Instead we were handed a remix of Mario 64 with better graphics and a gamechanging tweak in the game’s mechanics.  I, for one, enjoyed running around spraying paint monsters.  I thought that hovering added a nice extra dimension to the platforming.  I enjoyed using the rocketblast rather than trying to get the hang of another ungainly flight mechanic like the wing cap upgrade from Mario 64.

In short, I thoroughly enjoyed Mario Sunshine because of its changes and not despite them.  I may be in the minority in that opinion, but I stand by it.

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This animated music video set to the Dr. Mario theme song by Brentalfloss and Parker Simmons is pretty damned funny:

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I’ve been trying to get into the Final Fantasy IV remake for the DS, I really have, but did they have to make all of the characters look like medieval bobblehead dolls?  I’m not against revamping graphics on an old game as long as it improves the overall presentation, but I’m only about twenty minutes in and already the character design is driving me to distraction.  Perhaps I’m picking at nits, but it’s difficult to develop any sir of emotional investment in characters when they look like they would be more at home on the dashboard of a late 70s Firebird.

Not to mention that everyone looks and sounds like barely pubescent teenagers.  When I played the 16-bit version of Final Fantasy IV I had a mental image of Cecil as a grizzled and battle hardened commander grown weary of the world after one battle too many in the service of a king he no longer trusted.  The voice acting and character design has transformed him into the same androgynous pretty boy protagonist who is barely old enough to vote, let alone have a distinguished military career, that we’ve come to know and despise from the good folks at Squeenix.

Honestly, at this point I wouldn’t be surprised to see Tellah reimagined as a rebellious “old” twenty-something with an androgynous voice and plenty of Xtreme attitude.  I’m going to power through to see if the game remains compelling enough after all these years to make character design inconsequential, but at this point i’m starting to seriously wonder if hitting my mid-20s (which would qualify me for a senior citizen discount in most Final Fantasy settings) also means I’ve thoroughly aged out of Squeenix’s target demographic.

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Virtual Boy system and controller.

I’ve been on the lookout for a Virtual Boy for a few weeks now. All of the Gameboy coverage over at Retronauts this month got me to thinking about Nintendo’s red-screened stepchild, and playing through Six Golden Coins has only added to my desire to revisit Wario Land on the ‘ol VR headset.

The Virtual Boy was a much maligned system at it’s debut, and its reputation hasn’t much improved in the intervening years. Most gamers remember the system as an uncomfortable source of neck and eye strain due to the unfortunate positioning of the device’s headstand and its migraine-inducing binocular display that was born from the bastard spawn of an eye-exam machine and a foul demon intent on ruining children’s vision. Industry analysts remember it as the first chink in Nintendo’s armor as they arrogantly coasted out of the 16-bit era they had dominated into an uncertain future that would see Sony quickly claiming their throne with the Playstation.

The Virtual Boy was all of those things, but I still reserve a soft spot in my heart for the little red mutant system. I suppose it’s true that you can love almost anything viewed through the lens of indiscriminately overpowering nostalgia.

I was at a Meijer in early ‘96, my pockets were flush with Christmas cash, and the Virtual Boy, already on its deathbed so soon after its launch, was on sale for cheap. I picked up the system and two additional games for a grand total of $75. This was no small investment to a junior high kid with no steady income, but well worth it to have a fancy next generation portable system at a bargain price.

Sure the stand was a literal pain in the neck. I solved that one by playing while laying down with the stand resting on my chest and was quite comfortable. Sure the binocular viewscreen had a tendency to strain the eyes, but after adjusting it just so I found a settin I could play with no more discomfort than I’d already come to expect squinting at the blurry green postage stamp that passed for a screen on the Gameboy. And what’s more, the games were actually pretty fun, delivering a rich portable gaming experience that wouldn’t be matched until the Gameboy Advance a few years later.

Eventually I sold my Virtual Boy to my brother. I was moving away from gaming as high school and dating loomed on the horizon, and the Virtual Boy would be the last console I bought until I grabbed an old Super Nintendo in college heralding my return to console video games.

I had my brother pull the Virtual Boy out of storage this past weekend to get in a few games of Wario Land, but the right screen was ruined to the point of making games unplayable. So for now it seems that the Virtual Boy will remain in my gaming past, but it was a fun little system while it lasted, no matter what anyone else says.

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Good news for the five gamers out there who still haven’t picked up a Wii. Gamestop’s VP of marketing Bob McKenzie claims that everyone’s favorite secondhand game retailer finally has enough Wiis in stock to keep up with demand. While this is no doubt good news for the hordes of casual gamers still being swept up by the Wii juggernaut, for hardcore gamers this sudden abundance of stock after only three years on the market isn’t likely to dull the pain of camping out in front of every electronics retailer within 100 miles for several weekends in a row for a crack at the new Mario Kart.

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Bad news for potential DSi early adopters who don’t live in Japan. Nintendo has announced three new colors – pink, green, and blue – that will be released on March 20 in Japan. While new colors for a handheld system are hardly anything new from the big N, the fast turnaround this time around is surprising. And, in typical Nintendo fashion, no word yet on when or whether those colors will be hitting the U.S.

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Calling this post Virtual Console Releases is a bit of a misnomer this week since we’re just getting one retro game from the big N: Castlevania III: Dracula’s Curse.  We’ve had to wait two months longer than our European friends, who got the game last Halloween, but that’s nothing compared to the two-year wait they originally had to endure for the game back in the early 90s.

Dracula’s Curse was the last Castlevania game to be released for the Famicom/NES system, and as such it really shows its age.  The game abandons the adventure gaming elements of Castlevania II: Simon’s Quest and returns to the strict platforming of the original Castlevania game.  Several new characters who would later be woven into a backstory almost as convoluted as the most ambition Sonic/Tails/Knuckles slash fanfiction are introduced as well as a non-linear story that gives the player a certain degree of control over their journey through the game’s fifteen stages.

Castlevania III: Dracula’s Curse is an interesting footnote in the development of the series, but at its heart the game is still just another NES rendition of a series that wouldn’t reach perfection until Symphony of the Night in 1997.  If you’re a die-hard Castlevania fan then this is a no-brainer.  Otherwise you can safely give the dated graphics and gameplay on display in this once-great game a pass.

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I’ve had my eye on the copy of Ogre Battle: The March of the Black Queen at the local used game store for over half a decade.  The series, and the SNES game that launched it in particular, is almost universally regarded as one of the best tactical strategy roleplaying games ever created.  Those reviews are like a siren song for a man who will spend hundreds of hours leveling and crafting the perfect party in any strategy RPG he comes across.  Unfortunately the rather steep pricetag, well over $100 for an SNES cart, has always been enough to break the spell.

Today brings both good news and bad news for gamers who never got a chance to play this classic when it came out and who couldn’t bring themselves to spend the ridiculous amounts of money required for the SNES cart.  The good news is that the ESRB has officially rated Ogre Battle: The March of the Black Queen for release on the Virtual Console, meaning that it will finally get a cheap re-release.  The bad news is that Nintendo’s Virtual Console is where Square sends franchises to die.

Perhaps there will be enough of a show of support for Ogre Battle that Square might reconsider and decide to re-make one of their more quirky and interesting old titles rather than blessing us with Final Fantasy remakes and re-releases ad-nauseum, but don’t hold out too much hope.

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